


Forever Changed

by MissAdoration



Series: Love Through the Pain [5]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Drama, Established Relationship, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Religious Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-14 10:39:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 15,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5740567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissAdoration/pseuds/MissAdoration
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One is killed. One is taken captive. One is severely wounded. And with the help of a special guest, one will make a life-changing decision that will change their life forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here we begin part 5 of "Love Through the Pain" Might want to read "Russia" (still uploading) and "Simple, but Beautiful" first before this one, but not required. Warnings for mild violence. Also, this story does contain religious content. More on that in future notes.

Coulson was quietly working in his office when his phone rang. He checked the caller ID and saw that it was an unknown number. On the third ring, he hit the answer button.

"This is Coulson." 

"Agent Coulson, this is General Carlist Rieekan from the rebel base on Yavin 13. I can't explain now, but I need SHIELD's help. Meet me at the train station at 11:00." The line then went dead.

"Agent Hill," Coulson said into his earpiece. Maria Hill then walked into his office.

"Sir?" she asked.

"Assemble the team in room 3."

"Sir, with all due respect, Captain Rogers and Agent Romanoff are out for the day," she explained.

"Get them back here. This is a level 8," he said seriously.

"Yes, Sir," she responded. She then left the room. Along the way back to her office, she informed Clint, who was in one of the training rooms shooting with his bow, that Coulson wanted everyone to meet in room 3. Putting his bow and arrows back in his room, he went into the room and waited patiently for the rest of the team. Meanwhile, Agent Hill got out her cell phone and called Steve.

* * *

Steve and Natasha were enjoying a much needed break from SHIELD.

Ever since the two had returned to SHIELD after Natasha was fully recovered from the trauma from being held captive in Russia, it had been nonstop missions. They were very happy to have the day off to enjoy each other's company. Natasha was about 75% recovered from her captivity. A few scars were on her body and she would still occasionally have an anxiety attack and/or a nightmare, but she was glad that everything was over.

She was safe.

As they were walking into a local sandwich shop to get a bite to eat, Steve's cell phone rang. Natasha gave him the look.

"Rogers, I thought I told you to leave your phone at home."

"Romanoff, you know that I always take my phone with me. You never know what could happen." he responded as he pulled it out of his pocket.

"Very true," Natasha sighed. Steve then the answer button after checking the caller ID. It was Maria Hill.

"Agent Hill?"

"Captain, Coulson needs you and Romanoff back at SHIELD. Deep shadow conditions."

"We're on our way," he responded. He then hung up and looked at Natasha, who already figured out something was up.

"Coulson needs us back at SHIELD."

"Will we ever get a day to ourselves?" she asked.

"I promise one day we will take a day to ourselves, and yes, I will leave my phone at home."

"Deal. Let's go." The two then got into Natasha's car and drove back to SHIELD.

* * *

Back in room 3, Coulson, along with Maria and Clint, waited for Steve and Natasha to show up. He already had a worried look on his face as the final two members of his team walked into the room and sat down.

"What's going on, Sir?" Clint asked. Coulson then took a breath and spoke.

"I don't know much, but earlier today, I got a call from General Carlist Rieekan from the rebel base on Yavin 13. He needs SHIELD's help. We have an hour to get packed up and meet him at the train station."

"Yavin 13 is one of Alderaan's allies. I think we should help him," Natasha responded.

"He didn't give me much of a choice, Romanoff," Coulson answered. He then walked out of the room.

The team then followed and went to their rooms to pack up.


	2. Chapter 2

As Steve was packing up, he noticed that Natasha was visibly shaking as she was putting her guns in her bag.

"You OK?" he asked her quietly. She slowly looked at him.

"Yeah, just nervous. This mission, the events of Russia, my hand."

Steve stopped what he was doing and had Natasha sit down on the bed. He sat next to her, putting his arm around her shoulder.

"Nat, everything is going to be OK. You don't have to worry. I won't leave your side. And don't worry about your hand. You've learned to use in combat and you have done a great job." He then gave her a kiss on the forehead and embraced her. She smiled as her head fell against his chest.

"Thank you, Steve," she whispered. "I love you."

"I love you too," he said. She then left his arms and the two resumed packing.

* * *

A half hour later, Coulson and his team left headquarters and headed for the train station in one of the SHIELD SUV's

Upon arrival, they spotted General Rieekan sitting on a bench.

"Agent Coulson," he said as he shook Coulson's hand.

"General, what's this all about?"

"I'll explain in a minute. Come, I reserved us a private car," he responded. He then led the group to the car.

Once the bags were stored in the above compartment and everyone had found a seat, General Rieekan began to explain.

"I have been forced to put the base under lockdown after receiving a big threat from an enemy. I need SHIELD's help protecting us."

"But why us?" Colson asked.

"Two reasons. One, I've read that you guys are the best at combat operations. Two, you'll have to ask Leia this when we get there since she knows the reason better than I do, but when I told her who the threat was from, she responded with one word, 'Romanoff," he explained.

All eyes turned to Natasha as Steve took her hand.

The rest of the train ride was silent. Steve and Natasha were sitting next to each other with his arm around her shoulder. In the last thirty seconds, she just learned that somehow she was involved with the base on Yavin 13. She then leaned her head on Steve's shoulder and attempted to get some sleep.

"Hey, you alright?" Steve whispered as he felt Natasha's body movement.

"Yeah, I just want to get some rest," she whispered back before closing her eyes. Steve nodded as he listened to his partners' slow breathing pattern.

* * *

An hour later, the train stopped. Coulson got up and stood in front of Steve and Natasha, who was still asleep.

"Captain, is she alright?" he whispered.

"Yeah, she's just asleep. Why what's wrong?"

"We're here," Coulson responded.

"Oh. Ok. Can you help me with the bags? I really don't want to wake her if I don't have to. She had a rough night last night."

"Sure. I'll have Clint and Maria get them." He then walked over to where Maria and Clint were standing and sked them to help. They agreed, and the three of them grabbed Steve and Natasha's bags, as well as their own, and stepped off the train. Meanwhile, Steve carefully repositioned the sleepping Natasha so the he could stand up and lift her.

As he was walking off the train, he felt her body stiffen and her eyes slowly opening.

"Shh, it's ok. Go back to sleep," he whispered. She then closed her eyes and fell back asleep as Steve carried her to the base.


	3. Chapter 3

Inside the base, Leia greeted the team and had Han show them to their quarters. Her look changed when she saw Natasha in Steve's arms.

"Oh my gosh, is she OK?" she asked worriedly.

"She's just asleep," Steve whispered.

"Oh, thank God. Here, let me show you to your quarters," she responded. She then led Steve down a hallway and into the one of the rooms.

Inside, Leia pulled back the covers on the bed and he gently laid Natasha down. He then brought the covers up to her chin and gave her a kiss. He and Leia then quietly left the room and shut the door.

"How's she's doing since Russia?" Leia asked once they were outside the door.

"She's doing OK. She has a few nightmare here and there. They always are the same thing. Ivan is beating her and he won't stop," Steve explained. "Did she tell you what happened at her wedding ceremony?"

"She was starting to tell me, but midway through, she stopped and hung up. I never did call her back since I didn't want to scare her. What actually happened?"

"Well, right before we said our vows, I could see her body beginning to shake. As an extra precaution, Clint stood behind her in case she fell. When I was finished speaking my vows however, her shaking increased and her breathing was starting to get heavy. Clint then put a hand on her shoulder to try and calm her down. The second she felt the hand, she turned around and fell right into his arms. For about 10 minutes or so, he held her as her body continued to shake. Eventually she calmed down enough to speak her vows to me. I was so worried that she wouldn't make it, but she did."

"I'm surprised she didn't fall into your arms," Leia responded after wiping a tear from her eyes.

"I think she was waiting until the end until I could kiss her. I also think that because I was severely injured during most of her recovery, she developed a trust with Clint," Steve explained.

"I see. I hope things continue to get better for her. I've been praying for all of you."

Steve nodded at the comment. "Leia, General Rieekan said that when you knew who sent the threat to the base. He said that you responded with Romanoff's name. What did you mean?"

Before Leia could answer, a low moan followed by a somewhat loud scream was heard inside the room. Steve immediately rushed inside to see Natasha sitting up in bed, breathing heavily. He then sat on the bed and placed a hand on Natasha's shoulder. Her body then tensed up.

"Easy Nat, it's OK. It was just a dream," he spoke calmly as drew her close. Tears were streaming down her face and were beginning to soak a small section on Steve's shirt. "Ivan. He was here, beating me and he wouldn't stop!" she sobbed.

"Nat, Ivan's dead. Clint shot him with an arrow."

"No, he was here. I saw him. I saw the rod in his hand!"

Steve didn't respond. He just continued to hold Natasha's shaking body. Clint then came in the room.

"I heard her scream, but I couldn't get here fast enough. Is she OK?"

"She just had a nightmare. I got her," Steve respond. Clint nodded and quietly left the room.

A few minutes later, Natasha finally stopped shaking. Steve wiped the sweat and tears from her face and the two of them then joined the rest of the team.

* * *

Everyone was gathered in a small security room, staring intently at the computer screen that showed the outside of the base.

"The enemy is here, and they want to fight," General Rieekan spoke.

"Let's get 'em," Maria said as she grabbed a gun from the holster. Everyone nodded and walked out of the room to retrieve a weapon.

Within minutes, everyone was ready. Clint had his bow and arrows, Steve had his shield, and everyone else had one or two pistols each. Natasha, who was still recovering from her latest nightmare, held a pistol in her shaking hand she stood next to Steve.

She was ready to take on whoever crossed her path.


	4. Chapter 4

The attackers busted through the doors, setting off the security alarms. One of the guys shot a bullet at the system, causing the alarm to stop. Their leader then stepped forward and drew a gun. Natasha nearly fainted. Standing five feet in front of her was someone she knew from Russia. He was the guard outside her room when Ivan would leave her locked inside.

"I propose an exchange. If you win, then we surrender, however if we win, she comes with us!" he shouted as he cocked his gun and pointed it at Natasha's head. Steve then pushed her off to the side to avoid the bullet. He tried to put up his shield, but the bullet shot into his stomach, causing him to fall back. He cried out in pain, but that didn't stop him. He slowly got up and the battle began.

Everyone was engaging. Gun shots were fired and arrows were flying through the air. All of a sudden, one of the attackers came out of nowhere and began to drag Coulson away and toward the door. Hearing Coulson cry for help, Maria quickly ran toward the door, blocking the guy from getting out.

"Let him go!" she shouted as she cocked her gun.

"Not a chance, lady!" He hissed as he sent a bullet into her chest. She fell on the ground in front of the door. The attacker, still dragging Coulson with him, left a grenade by the body and walked out.

Clint had seen the whole thing. He quickly jumped down from where he was and started running toward Maria, who was bleeding out. He stopped short when he saw the grenade.

"Grenade!" He shouted as it exploded. He then fell back.

When the smoke cleared he slowly sat up and felt his face. Blood was dripping from his left cheek. A few feet in front of him, Maria lay on the ground.

She wasn't moving.

He then rushed over to her side.

"Hill, can you hear me?" He half shouted at her.

She didn't respond.

Placing two fingers on her neck, he looked for a pulse.

Nothing.

He then spoke into his earpiece. "Captain, Hill is down and Coulson is gone."

Before Steve could respond, a scream was heard a few feet away from him. It was Natasha. Looking over. He saw Natasha being strangled by the leader of the group. He was just about the rush over, but Steve was already there. He then directed his attention back to Maria. Very carefully, he lifted her unconscious body and carried her to the lab where Han, Leia, and General Rieekan, were being treated by the doctor who worked at the base.

After laying Maria on one of the beds, he rushed back out to continue fighting, as well as help Steve if he needed it.

* * *

Back in the main room. The leader was still strangling Natasha as Steve watched in horror. He was slightly unsure of how to attack this man.

"You're mine, Natalia. And you always will be," He hissed at her.

Natasha struggled to get free. The guy was tightly squeezing her neck and she couldn't breathe. The next thing she knew, she was thrown to the ground. Steve had decided to attack him from behind by swiping the guy's legs out from under him, forcing him to drop Natasha. Unfortunately, the guy recovered quickly, grabbed his gun and pointed it at Steve.

Natasha tried to go into a hand stand, but she was too weak from being strangled to push herself up.

She then heard a gunshot.

The guy just shot Steve a second time. The next thing she knew, a big boot was beating her chest. She let out a piercing scream when she heard her ribs crack. Clint, who had seen Steve go down, wasted no time in acting. He quickly drew and arrow and pointed it at the leader, who was still beating on Natasha's chest.

"Get off of her! No one hurts my partner. Ever!" Clint shouted.

"Natalia belongs to me," he hissed back.

"It's Natasha." And with that, Clint released the string from his hand, sending the arrow into the guy's chest. He fell back. Dead. Clint then rushed to Natasha's side.

"Nat. hang in there," he said. Natasha still struggling to breathe. Black was slowly creeping into her eyes as she glanced at Steve, who was bleeding out from his wounds. She then looked up at Clint.

"Clint. Steve's been shot." Her eyes then closed and she faded out. Clint then spoke into his earpiece.

"I need a med team out here!" he shouted. Within seconds, a group of men arrived with 2 stretchers. A couple of the guys attended to Steve while the rest attended to Natasha.

Eventually, both victims were taken to the medical wing of the base.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we meet the special guest

Natasha blinked a few times as she slowly woke up. She looked around and figured out that she was in an examination room. She also found Clint staring at her.

"Clint, is that you?" she asked weakly.

"Yeah," he responded

She looked up and saw a white bandage that covered just about his entire left cheek.

"What happened to you?" she asked.

"I got hit with a grenade. It will heal soon," he responded back.

"And the rest of the team?"

Clint took a breath, took her hand in his, and spoke softly to her.

"Well, Agent Hill is dead. She was shot trying to stop one of the attackers from taking Coulson, which he succeeded in. Leia suffered two broken legs, Luke had damage to his mechanical hand, and Han and General Rieekan suffered gunshot wounds to the shoulders."

A tear slid down Natasha's face when she heard that Maria was dead. She was the only other female agent that she had as a friend, and now she was gone.

"Steve," she said trying to sit, but a pain in her chest caused her to be unsuccessful.

"Easy, Nat. You suffered two broken ribs," Clint said easing her back down.

"Where is he?" she asked as more tears started form in her eyes.

"He's in a different room. He suffered two gunshot wounds to the stomach."

"Take me to him. Please. I want to see him1" Natasha cried.

Very carefully, Clint lifted Natasha out of the bed and into a wheelchair that was in the room. He then wheeled her to where Steve was.

Inside, Natasha's heart stopped. Her husband laid in a hospital bed with multiple machines hooked up to him. Clint wheeled her closer to the bed and she picked up Steve's limp hand and held it in hers. Tear were slowly coming down her cheeks.

"Is he going to make it?"

"It's too soon to tell right now," Clint answered.

A few minutes later, Leia wheeled herself in.

"Clint, General Rieekan wants to see you," she spoke. Natasha stiffened at the new voice that was in the room. Clint then put a hand on her shoulder, calming her down. She looked over her shoulder and saw that it was Leia.

"Ok, can you stay with Nat?"

"Sure." Clint then stepped back to allow Leia to wheel in next to Natasha. He then left the room.

"Natasha, I'm so sorry."

"Thank you, Leia," Natasha responded with tears.

"Is he going to make it?"

"Clint said it was too soon to tell."

The two girls continued to sit in the room in silence as they listened to the machines beep.

"What happened to you?" Natasha asked a few seconds later.

"My legs are broken. One of the guys decided to beat me until he heard them crack. I won't be able to walk for a while. How about you?"

"According to Clint, I suffered two broken ribs. The leader wouldn't stop beating me. How's everyone else?"

"Everyone's OK. They all suffered minor injuries. Did Clint tell you?'

Natasha nodded yes.

"Leia, General Rieekan said that you mentioned my name when you learned about this mission. What did you mean?'

"I wanted to protect you. The threat came from Russia. He claimed he knew. I guess then he hacked into SHIELD''s files and learned that you knew us, so he wanted to use us to find you," Leia explained.

"I kinda figured that out when he called me Natalia and tried to kill me," Natasha responded. "Is he dead?"

"Yeah. I think Clint nailed him with an arrow."

"Good. I don't want to see him ever again."

"If you don't mind, how are you doing since Russia? Steve told me a little bit of your recovery earlier today, but I want to hear from you."

Natasha began to tense up. She then took a breath to try and relax herself and then spoke.

"I'm doing OK. I still have a few nightmares. They're always the same. Ivan is beating me and he won't stop. I can see the rod in his hand. He won't stop until he is satisfied. I am always crying out and screaming, but then he hits me even harder."

"I'm so sorry that happened to you. I know what's it's like to have been beat up," Leia said as she put a hand on her shoulder.

"Thank you, Leia," Natasha whispered. The two then continued to sit in silence in the room.

* * *

Tears were falling down Natasha's face.

She needed a friend.

No, she needed a fresh opinion.

"Leia. I need help. Agent Hill is dead and I'm the only female agent left. I need a fresh opinion from someone of the same gender. Can you help? Do you know someone?"

Leia thought for a few minutes. Of course she knew someone.

Anna Flannigan.

Anna was a teenager that lived on Alderaan for about a year before returning home. During her time on Alderaan, Anna had helped her come to know the LORD and what it means to have a relationship with Jesus. If she could get Anna to come to Yavin 13, she could probably do the same for Natasha.

"I do know someone. Her name is Anna Flannigan. She helped me in the past when I was struggling with some of my own demons. I'm sure she can help you too."

"Please. Whatever you can do. I need someone else to talk to."

"OK, I'll go call her right now. Be right back." Leia then wheeled out of the room to go and called Anna.

* * *

Anna Flannigan was sitting on her bed reading a book when her cell phone rang. She wasn't expecting any calls that night, so she wondered who it was. Seeing Leia's name on the caller ID, she answered it on the third ring.

"Anna. It's Leia. Sorry to bother you at this hour, but I need help," Leia spoke.

"Leia, is everything OK?"

"Not exactly. A friend of mine needs help. She's struggling emotionally after some things that happened earlier today."

"What's her name?"

"Natasha Romanoff, from SHIELD. Have you ever head of her?"

Anna responded that she did. "What happened?"

"Her husband and fellow team members were helping us on Yavin 13. All of us are hurt, but her husband, Steve Rogers is still in critical condition, He was shot twice in the stomach," Leia explained.

"Oh my gosh. What about her?"

"She suffered two broken ribs, but she's more hurt emotionally than physically. Did you hear about her captivity in Russia?"

"I briefly read about it," Anna said as she set her book back on the nightstand.

"She's been traumatized really badly, The only other female that she knows at SHIELD is now dead. She needs someone else." She then took a breath. "Anna, she needs Jesus."

"OK. I'm coming. Where are you?" Anna said getting off her bed.

"At the base on Yavin 13," Leia explained, "Hurry, she's at her breaking point."

"I'm on my way right now," Anna said. She then hung up her phone, packed a few things, and left for the train station.


	6. Chapter 6

Two hours later, Anna arrived at the hospital. Leia greeted her in the lobby.

"Nice to see you again, Anna," Leia said as Anna leaned over to give her a hug.

"What happened to you?"

"I suffered two broken legs. I'll be OK," Leia explained.

"How's Natasha? Is she still at her breaking point?"

"She's close to it," Leia replied.

"Where is she?"

"She's in Steve's room."

"OK, I can push you so you can give your arms a break," Anna said as she stood up behind Leia's chair.

"Thanks."

Anna then pushed Leia to where Steve was. Inside, the room was empty except for Steve and a wheelchair. Leia then got out her cell phone and called Natasha.

No answer.

She then called Clint.

"She's back in her room and I'm with her. She had a severe anxiety attack. She reached her breaking point," Clint said. In the background, Leia could hear Natasha's heavy breathing and tears.

"Alright, I'm coming now," Leia then hung up and told Anna where to go.

Inside, Clint had his arms wrapped tightly around Natasha's shaking body, trying desperately to calm her down. As they got closer, Leia could see sweat on Natasha's teary face. Her breathing sounded worse than it did on the phone.

"What happened?" Leia asked quietly. Anna had stayed back to give them their space.

"We were just sitting in Steve's room when I saw her body tense up. Her breathing pattern changed and she began to shake. Acting quickly, I just left the chair in the room and carried her back here. A nurse saw us and figured out what was going on. She's on her way with a sedative to help." Clint explained.

"How long has she been like this?"

"We've been in the room for about ten minutes. I think she hit her breaking point at about the five minute mark."

"Clint!" Natasha cried."

"Easy Nat. Slow breaths. You're going be OK. I got you," Clint soothingly spoke to her and he continued to hold her.

"I'm scared. Ivan is out there somewhere!" she cried again.

"Ivan's dead. You don't have to worry. You're safe."

The tears, shaking and heavy breaths continued. Natasha was definitely at her breaking point and everyone could see it. Clint continued to hold her tightly and talk soothingly to her to calm her down. Finally, the nurse came in with the sedative. Anna and Leia then left the room.

"How long has it been?" Anna asked once they were outside.

"About two months. I think. She even had an attack at her wedding."

"Oh my gosh. What happened?"

"According to Steve, the shaking began right before the vows. After he spoke his, her shaking increased so much that Clint had to calm her down. The ceremony eventually got finished."

"Oh my."

"From what Steve told me, it sounded really scary.

A few minutes later, the nurse walked out of the room and the two girls walked in. Natasha was now laying down on the bed, half-asleep. 

"Is she OK?"

"Yeah, the sedative kicked in right away," Clint explained.

"Can she talk?"

"I'm not sure she can hold a conversation, but you can try," Clint said. He then looked at Anna. "Who's this?"

"Clint, this is Anna Flannigan. She's one of my friends who helped me out in the past when I was struggling. I think she can help Natasha."

"Nice to meet you, Anna. I'm Clint Barton, Agent of SHIELD. This is my partner and friend, Natasha Romanoff."

"Nice to meet both of you I've read a lot about all of you," Anna said as she shook Clint's hand.

"Cool." He then turned to Leia. "Leia, I'm supposed to go on a mission with General Rieekan. He found Coulson. However I'm not sure I want to leave Natasha. Not now at least."

"Clint, Anna and I can stay with her. You don't have to worry."

"OK. Let me get chair back in here for you. She'll probably want to be back in Steve's room again." He then quickly left to go get the chair. Upon returning, he lifted Natasha out of the bed and into the chair."

"Nat, I have to go and rescue Coulson. I'll be back soon," he whispered.

"Clint, don't' leave me. Please!" she cried as she fell into his arms.

"Shh. It's going to be OK," he spoke soothingly.

"No!" she cried as she clung tighter to Clint. Heavy tears streamed down her face.

She didn't want him to leave.

"Nat, everything's alright. Leia's here with a friend. It's Ok. You can trust her. Leia thinks she can help you."

"I don't think anyone can help me," she sobbed. Clint held her for a few for minutes. He then kissed her on the head.

"I'll be back soon." He then stood up and left the room. Natasha watched him with tears.

* * *

After drying her tears, she focused her attention on the two girls that were in the room. One was Leia. The other one was wearing a purple t-shirt and jeans. She also had the same color hair as her, and it was tied back.

"Natasha, this is Anna Flannigan. She's the friend I was telling you about."

"Nice to meet you, Anna," Natasha said weakly as she shook Anna's hand.

"You as well, Natasha. I heard about what happened with Steve. I'm so sorry."

"Thank you." She then wiped a tear from her eye and cleared her throat. "How much do you know about me?"

"Not a lot. I did hear about Russia. I'm so sorry."

At the sound of Russia, Natasha's look changed and her body began to tense up. Realizing what she had done, Anna acted quickly. She kneeled down by Natasha, put a hand on her shoulder and spoke calmly.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

At the sound of Anna's calm voice, Natasha's body relaxed and she looked at Anna's sympathetic face.

"It's OK. It's just really hard for me to talk about that."

Anna then embraced Natasha in a hug and softly spoke. "If you ever want to talk about it. I'll be here to listen."

"Thanks," Natasha responded back as Anna left her arms. "Can you take me back to Steve's room? I want to be there when he wakes up." 

"Sure." Natasha then told Anna where to go. Leia decided to go get a late dinner. She had already been released earlier in the day.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is where the religious content begins. It has been modified a bit from the version on fanfiction.

Inside Steve's room, Anna sat down in the chair and studied Steve's body. His body lay very peaceful in the bed as the machines hummed and beeped around him. He was also hooked to an IV line to keep him hydrated.

After giving Anna a few minutes, Natasha came up by the bedside.

"Is he going to make it?" Anna asked.

"We don't know yet. I really haven't heard anything new."

Anna nodded. She then took Steve's hand in hers and whispered something that Natasha couldn't quite make out.

The two girls were silent for a few minutes before Natasha spoke up.

"How do you know Leia?"

"It's a long story, but I've known her since 2010. I helped her through her struggles many times. She's suffered from physical and mental trauma, just like you."

"She seems fine now," Natasha said.

"She's doing better than when I first met he, but every now and then, she'll have a nightmare of her past." Anna explained.

"What changed?"

"She has a friend now. Someone who is always there for her when I can't be there."

"I know she has Han and Luke, but who else is in her life?"

"He's actually my friend too. I introduced her to him. His name is Jesus Christ."

"Do you think he can love someone like me?"

"He will, if you ask him to."

Natasha looked puzzled for a few minutes. She didn't understand was Anna was saying.

"What do you mean if I allow him to?"

"You have to want a relationship with him. To make a change. I know he will if you ask."

"How do I do that? How can I meet him?"

"Right here. I'm willing to help you too."

"Please, I need all the help I can get," Natasha said.

"OK, but I have to tell you a little about him first." Anna then took a breath and began to speak. 

"Jesus Christ was a great teacher. He taught people how to live and act in accordance with his will," Anna explained.

"Does Jesus have a father?" Natasha asked.

"Yes. He actually has two. He has an earthly father and a heavenly father. His earthly father is named Joseph and his heavenly father is God. God is the one who created the very earth we live in. He created people, animals, and even you and me." 

"So why would God and his son want to have a relationship with me?" Natasha asked.

"Because he loves you. He knows what you have done. Natasha, he did something that I can't imagine doing myself. He saved you and me. We are all sinners. We all make mistakes, or as you say 'have red in your ledger.'"

"How did he save me? I mean, come on, you've read my history. I'm an assassin! What could he have possibly have done to save someone like me?" Natasha asked. 

"Natasha, please allow me to explain. 2,000 years ago, on a Friday afternoon, he carried a heavy wooden cross up a hill. Soldiers then drove long nails into his wrists and feet. He was to be crucified." 

All of a sudden, Natasha couldn't breathe. The image that Anna just described was in her mind. She pictured the solider driving one of the nails into Jesus' wrist. Her mind then drifted to the days when Ivan bound her hands tightly above her head and beat her nonstop. 

Noticing her tense up, Anna gently placed a hand on her shoulder. "Natasha, are you alright?"

"Sorry, that's just a terrifying image," Natasha responded. 

"Indeed it is, but remember, He did it so we could be saved.  We cannot save ourselves; only God can. We should be the ones on the cross, but He went for us. He forgave us from our sins, even the ones we commit today."

"So this man died for me and forgave me of my sins?"

"Yes, but there's more. Jesus didn't stay dead. After three days, he rose from the dead and is now seated at the right hand of God, his father in Heaven. He defeated death. He's alive!"

"Wow! That sounds amazing!" Natasha exclaimed.

"It was the greatest day in history. Death was beaten/ He rescued you and me!" Anna answered. 

At that point, Natasha was ready to have the relationship that Anna was talking about. "How do I have that relationship?"

Tears were now forming in Natasha's eyes and were starting to fall down her face. In the last 2 minutes, she learned that there was someone out there who loved her so much that he would carry a cross up a hill, be nailed to it. and die for her. 

"Alright, Anna. I'm ready. What do I have to do? How do I have a relationship with him?" 

"It's actually very easy. First you admit you are a sinner. Then you believe that He died for you. Finally you chose to have a relationship with Him," Anna explained.

"OK then, I'm ready." 

"Alright then." Anna then took Natasha's hands and held them in hers. "Repeat after me. Dear God, please forgive me. I know I'm a sinner." 

"Dear God, please forgive me. I know I'm a sinner."

"I believe Jesus died and rose from the dead…"

"I believe Jesus died and rose from the dead…"

"so I could be forgiven of my sins…"

"so I could be forgiven of my sins…"

"and live forever in heaven."

"and live forever in heaven."

"Thank you for loving me…"

"Thank you for loving me…"

"and allowing me to have a personal relationship with you."

"and allowing me to have a personal relationship with you."

"In Jesus' name I pray, Amen."

"Amen." Natasha said with tears.

"Natasha Alianovna Romanoff, congratulations. You have been born again in Christ." Anna said.

"That's it."

"That's it. You are now a follower of Christ." 

"Thank you. Thank you so much. I feel different now. I feel changed." Natasha said as she gave Anna a hug.

"You are very welcome."

"So you taught me a lot in the past 5 minutes or so, how can I remember all of it?" Natasha asked a few seconds later. 

"Let me show you using a simple image, and actually, this is one of my favorite images to draw. I remember doing it about 7 years ago at my church." She then got out a notebook and pen from her backpack and opened to a clean page. 

"Picture a bridge," Anna said as she drew a bridge on the page. "God is one side of the bridge and we are on the other. In the middle, there is this gap. This gap exists because we want to rebel against God and go our own way. This is called sin." 

Natasha watched intently as Anna drew the image on the page. She pictured herself standing on the bridge and wanting to get to the other side. 

"As you can see, we can't get to the other side on our won. We need someone else to help up to get across. That's why God sent his son, Jesus, to Earth. You see, Jesus was sent by God to be born a man to save his people from their sins. Jesus is the bridge. Now because you have decided to have a relationship with Him and have asked Him to be your friend, you will live forever with Him in a place called Heaven," Anna explained as she drew an arrow from one side of he bridge to the other. 

"Is it beautiful?" 

"From what I've read in scripture, it is," Anna responded. 

"I can't wait to see it," Natasha said as she wiped a few tears from her eyes. 

"Neither can I."

"So what happens now? Is there more?" Natasha asked. 

"Yes, there is. God promises that He will never leave us. One of my favorite things that it says in His word is this 'never will I leave you, nor will I forsake you.' God will not leave you, Natasha. He will be by your side wherever you are. He will wrap his arms around you and not let you go. Ever." 

"That's amazing. I'm so glad Leia called you. I think this is exactly what I needed." 

"I'm glad I was able to help you," Anna answered. 

"So, if you were to summarize this all in one sentence, what would you say?" Natasha asked. Anna closed her eyes to think for a few minutes. 

"Jesus came to this earth to be our bridge, and whoever crosses the bridge will live with God forever!" 

"That's amazing. Thank you again, Anna." 

You're welcome. Always remember that God loves you very much and that He will never leave your side," Anna responded. She then tore the page from her notebook and handed it to Natasha so she could keep it forever and have a memory of the night she got saved. 

 A few minutes later, Leia returned to the room.

"Hey guys, I brought you all back a bite to eat," Leia said. She then handed the two girls a bottle of water and a bag of chips.

"Thanks Leia. Hey by the way, I have good news," Natasha responded

"What's that?"

"Anna, she came just at the right time. She introduced me to Jesus. I now have a relationship with him."

"Natasha, that's amazing. I'm so proud of you. I always prayed that one day you would discover Him. He's an amazing person," Leia said is she leaned over to give Natasha a hug.

"I can't wait to learn more about Him."

Anna then pulled out her phone and tapped her screen again. She then handed it to Natasha. 

"Here, you can borrow my Bible app for a while." 

"Thank you, but where do I start?"

"Start at the beginning. When God created the earth." Anna said as she helped Natasha navigate the app.

"OK, thanks again for everything," Natasha said as Anna handed her back the phone.

"You're welcome." Anna then left the room to spend a few minutes with Leia.

Before falling asleep that night, Natasha began to speak to God for the first time. 

"Dear God, I know we just met, but I have something I want to ask you. God, I want to sleep tonight. Every night, I have nightmares of my past. There's a man with a rod in his hand, beating me and he won't stop."

Her heart started to beat faster as the memory started to creep into her mind.

"I don't want him to be in my thoughts tonight, or any night. Please, help me to sleep tonight. Help me not to think about him."

From out of nowhere, she heard a soft whisper.

"My daughter, you will be at peace tonight."

Realizing who is was, she smiled and fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Bible app can be downloaded from the app store or GooglePlay.


	8. Chapter 8

Clint was nervous as he rode with in the jet with General Rieekan. Earlier in the day, Han and the general located where Coulson was being held captive. It was Han's idea that Clint went along so that Coulson could see a familiar face.

"Barton, you alright?" General Rieekan asked.

"Yeah. Just worried about Romanoff."

"What's wrong?"

"She was having a severe anxiety attack when I left. She was even at her breaking point. A nurse gave her a sedative, but I was still hesitant to leave her," Clint explained.

"I can turn around if you want."

"No, it's OK."

The two eventually arrived at the facility where Coulson was being held.

"What's your plan, General?" Clint asked as he slipped his quiver over his back.

"Find Coulson. Get him out. Get you back to Romanoff."

"You got it," Clint responded.

Within minutes of stepping off the jet, Clint and the General were greeted by six guards. All were quickly taken out in less than two minutes. The next thing they knew, the newly appointed head guard was approaching them with a gun.

"Where's Coulson?" Clint asked angrily with an arrow pointed at the guy's chest.

"I'll never tell you, archer!" he shouted. Clint pulled back the string.

"I'm not going to ask you again," Clint said sternly. The guard then put his hands up.

"Alright. Fine. I surrender. Don't shoot me!" he pleaded.

"Bring out Coulson and I'll think about it," Clint said. He still had an arrow pointed at the guard. The guard then had Coulson brought out. He was just wearing his white button-down shirt and pants. He had taken off his jacket during the attack back at the base. Once Clint saw him, he lowered his bow.

"What do you want in return?" he asked as Coulson stood back by General Rieekan. He now had to finish the guy off.

"Natalia. Dead," he guard responded.

"Never!" Clint hissed. He then quickly raised his bow and shot the guard. The arrow landed in the guy's chest and he fell back. Dead. Clint then stood over his unmoving body.

"And for the last time, it's Natasha." He then sent another arrow in the guy's chest.

"Nice shot, Barton. And thank you," Coulson responded.

"Welcome back, Sir," General Rieekan said. Meanwhile, Clint slipped the quiver off his back and the three of them left.

Back on the jet, Coulson described his captivity.

"They wanted information on Romanoff, but I wouldn't speak. They decided to beat me until I would reveal something. Which I still didn't. Finally, he gave up and left me in a cell."

"Any other injuries?" the General asked.

"No, just a few whip wounds on my back. I'll be alright." He then took a breath and turned to look at Clint. "Barton, what about the team?"

"That might take a while to explain, Sir," Clint responded.

"I don't care. I want to know," Coulson demanded.

Clint then explained to him about each of the members and their injuries. When he told him about Maria, Coulson put his head down

"She was trying to defend you," Clint said putting a hand on Coulson's shoulder.

"She was the best agent I ever worked with," Coulson responded looking at Clint's sympathetic face.

A half hour later, the three arrived at the hospital. According to a text from Leia, Steve still hadn't woken up yet and Natasha was being kept there for the night because of the anxiety attack she had before he left.

While Coulson was being tended to by a doctor, Clint walked over to Natasha's room.

Inside the room, a sense of ease came over him. Natasha was sleeping peacefully with a smile on her face. He didn't want to wake her, for he was afraid that he would startle her and she would have another attack. So, as quietly as he could, he kissed her on the cheek. Next to her bed, Anna sat in a chair and was reading a book.

"Anna," he whispered. "How's she doing?" Anna then closed her book and set in on her lap.

"Much better. Leia went back to her quarters. I told her I would stay until you got back."

"Thank you."

At the sound of the unfamiliar voice, Natasha stirred. Her eyes flashed open and she sat up in bed, looking for the voice. She then felt a strong arm grabbing on to hers.

"Easy, Nat. It's just me, Go back to sleep."

Realizing who it was, her body relaxed and she laid back down. Clint then gave her another kiss.

"Clint." Natasha whispered

"Yeah?"

"When this is over, I have an amazing story to tell you."

"I can't wait to hear it, Nat." She the closed her eyes Clint then looked to Anna.

"What is she talking about?"

"You'll have to wait, Agent Barton. Besides, I think you should hear it from her."

"Alright," Clint sighed. "Anna if you want, I can take over."

"Good idea. It's probably better if you're here anyway, you know, in case something happens. I can really see that she trusts you," Anna said as she grabbed her book and the two walked out of the room

"I was the one there for her after Russia, and I also recruited her."

"I read about that somewhere. That was really cool what you did."

"Thank you. She's come a long way." Clint said.

After Anna left, he went back into Natasha's room, sat in the chair where Anna had been, and attempted to get some sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Clint awoke the next morning to Natasha's slow breathing. He was amazed at what he saw. Whatever Anna had done last night must've worked because he didn't see a trace of fear in her eyes.

Natasha then awoke when she heard Coulson wheel himself into the room.

"Agent Romanoff," he spoke quietly.

"Coulson, welcome back," she said.

"Thank you, and how are you doing."

"Much better. I'm ready to go back to SHIELD."

"Me too. Everyone has been so kind here, but I'm ready to be back at HQ," he said smiling.

"Sir, how's your back." Clint asked.

"It's OK. A few cuts and bruises. Very stiff."

"I know what that's like," Natasha responded.

"Yeah, me too. Sorry, Coulson," Clint added.

"Thanks guys. I'll be back to normal soon enough." He then wheeled himself out. Meanwhile, Natasha's breakfast arrived as well as a tray for Clint.

"So, how about story you were mentioning last night," Clint said as they were eating.

"No, not yet. You'll have to keep waiting, Barton," she responded back smiling.

"Still stubborn, are we?"

"Yep," Natasha smiled. Clint sighed and the two resumed eating.

"Want to take a walk?' Clint asked once the trays were cleared.

"Sure."

Clint then carefully lifted her into her wheelchair and they walked out of the room. She and Steve were the only two still admitted to the hospital. She would've been released last night, but because of her anxiety attack, the doctor agreed that she should stay the night. Her ribs were healing nicely, but every now and then, she would have a little pain. Other than that, things were good. After what happened last night with Anna, she was definitely ready to go home.

Clint wheeled Natasha down the hall. They didn't have a destination in mind. They just wanted to have fun and enjoy each other's company. Ever since Natasha and Steve returned to SHIELD after recovering from Russia, it had been nonstop missions for all of them. Most of hers with were with Steve and a few were with him. While he liked the busyness of SHIELD, he also like having some downtime, whether it was being alone or spending time with Natasha. Yes, she was married and Clint respected that. They were just friends having fun.

A few minutes later, Clint turned around and headed back to the nurse's station to see about having Natasha released later that day.

"She did fine last night. No attack," Clint said to the nurse.

"Very well. I can discharge her now. According to her chart, her ribs are healing nicely as well. Just keep being cautious."

"I will," Natasha responded.

After signing a few papers, Clint wheeled Natasha back to her room. Before he let her stand up, he got down on her level and spoke.

"Nat, I don't know what happened last night, but you're different this morning. I haven't seen a trace of fear in you at all. Since you woke up. Also, even though you are married, my arms are still open whenever you need comforting. I will never leave you and neither will Steve. We both care about you, and now that I think of it, so does Coulson. All of us care. We want to help you when you face your demons."

Tears began to fall down Natasha's face. The fact that everyone cared about her was amazing. She was glad that she made the decision to follow Christ. It had definitely changed her life.

"Thank you, Clint. Thank you for still caring about me."

"You're welcome."

After giving her a hug, he helped her stand from the chair. They then walked to Steve's room, dropping off the wheelchair along the way. The nurse was hesitant at first, but Clint reassured her she would be fine. To stress his point, he put his arm around Natasha and the two continued on to Steve's room.


	10. Chapter 10

Inside Steve's room, the doctor was making sure everything was going well, which it was.

"The wounds are healing nicely. Hopefully he'll wake up soon," he said to Natasha and Clint.

"How much pain is he going to be in?" Clint asked.

"He'll be a little stiff, but it won't be too serious when he wakes up. If it continues, I can give him a pain reliever."

"OK," Clint responded. The doctor then left the room as Clint led Natasha to the chair next to the bed. Upon sitting down, she took Steve's hand in hers.

"Steve, I can't wait for you to wake up. I have something amazing to tell you and the team."

Once Clint left the room, Natasha took out her phone and began to read on the bible app she downloaded on her phone last night before falling asleep.. Ever since she started reading last night, she immediately fell in love with the words. So far, she red read about the creation of the world, the Garden of Eden, Noah and the flood, and the tower of Babel. Today she would focus on the Ten Commandments, the birth of Jesus, a few of his parables, as well as his death and resurrection.

* * *

 

(Two Hours Later)

Steve blinked a few times and his eyes searched the room. His stomach was stiff and he felt a few bandages under the hospital gown. He didn't remember much from yesterday's attack. The last thing he remembered was the sound of a gunshot. He then turned his head to his left, where he saw Natasha. She was staring closely at her cell phone.

"You're not supposed to have cell phones in the hospital," he silently teased.

Thinking it was a security guard, Natasha immediately dropped her phone into her lap and put her hands up. She then looked around for a guard, but didn't see one.

"Nat, I was kidding," the voice said again. She then turned her head and saw Steve with his eyes opened and smiling.

"Steve, you're awake!" she exclaimed. Her face then turned serious. "Don't you ever scare me like that again."

"Sorry, but what were you reading? I've never seen you look at your phone like that."

"Oh, it was just a book that I downloaded," she answered.

"About?"

She wanted to lie, but she just read earlier today about how God told his people not to lie to others.

"It's about a man who was sentenced to death on a cross for blasphemy," she explained.

"Is he Russian?"

"Nope."

"Interesting. Most of the time I always see you reading something about Russian," he teased.

"Enough about me. How are you feeling?"

"Stiff, but good. You?"

"Same, although my injuries don't include two gunshot wounds," she responded.

"I was shot?"

"Yeah. Clint said you were trying to stop the leader of the group from killing me."

"Barton, is he alright?"

"Everyone is alive, well, all but one," Natasha answered. 

"Who?"

"Hill. She was killed trying to defend Coulson, who was taken captive. Barton and General Rieekan got him out. "

"Sorry, Nat. I know you and her were close," Steve said sympathetically.

"Thank you."

A few minutes later, the doctor came back into the room.

"Glad to see you awake Captain. How are you feeling?"

"Little stiff," Steve replied.

"That should go away soon, Cap. Anything else?"

"How bad was I shot?"

"Both bullets damaged your small intestine. We were able to get them out. They now just have to heal," the doctor explained.

"Is there a chance that I could be released soon?"

"Possibly later tonight. Your stomach still needs to recover from the wounds, as well as the surgery we performed to remove the bullets. I want to keep you at least for tonight."

"OK," Steve responded. The doctor then left the room.

"Nat, you said that you were stiff too. What happened to you?"

"I suffered two broken ribs. Oh, and I had a severe anxiety attack."

"Still?"

"Yeah. It was really serious. Clint said I reached my breaking point, but I was actually able to get some sleep last night. Well, until Barton came in and woke me up."

"Oh, Barton," Steve smiled. Natasha's phone then went off. It was Leia.

"Nat, is Steve awake yet? Anna wants to see him."

"He just woke up about fifteen minutes ago. Send her over," Natasha responded. She then hung up.

"Who's Anna?" Steve asked.

"She's a friend of Leia's. I'll explain it some other time when we're all back together, but she is part of the reason for me sleeping so well last night."

"Before Barton, or after?" Steve teased.

"Both, however it was more peaceful once he was in the room."


	11. Chapter 11

Ten minutes later, Anna arrived and came into Steve's room.

"Steve, this is Anna Flannigan. Anna, this is my husband, Captain Steve Rogers," Natasha said.

"'It's nice to meet you, Captain. I've heard a lot about you," Anna said shaking his hand.

"You as well, Anna. I understand you're the reason why my wife got some actual sleep last night."

"You can say that, yeah," Anna smiled.

"Thank you. I haven't seen her this happy since our wedding."

"You're welcome."

"Anna, I have a few questions about the app I downloaded. Can we go somewhere more private?" Natasha spoke up.

"Sure." Anna and Natasha then stepped outside the room.

In the hallway, Anna showed Natasha how to create her profile and friend a few people. So far, she requested Leia, Han, Luke, and Anna to be her friends.

"I just got it. I'll accept it right now," Anna said taking out her phone and opening the app.

"Thanks Anna."

Anna also showed Natasha how to highlight, bookmark, and write notes. She also directed Natasha to one of the one-year reading plans. She would've started it, but she wanted to wait until she told the team.

Then they could start together.

 

"Hey, I just remembered. You should add a picture to your profile. Do you have one on your phone?"

"I do," Natasha said smiling.

With Anna's help, Natasha picked a picture of her and Steve from the wedding. The two girls also exchanged phone numbers and set profile pictures on each other's contact information.

"Have you told anyone about your decision yet?" Anna asked.

"Not yet. I'm going to wait until we're all back at SHIELD. Leia knows though."

"That's great. I'll be praying for all of you," Anna replied.

 

"Thanks again for everything. Are you heading home later today?"

"Tomorrow actually, I want to spend some time with Leia and her family. It's been a while since I've seen them," Anna explained.

"OK. Steve should hopefully be released by then, so maybe we'll see you tomorrow."

"Sounds good," Anna responded.

After saying 'good-bye' to Steve, Anna left the hospital and returned to the base. Meanwhile, Natasha stayed in Steve's room and they chatted about what happened before he woke up.

 


	12. Chapter 12

Later that day,  Steve was released to go home. His lower abdomen was still stiff from the wounds, but that would heal eventually. The doctor gave him a pain relieve just in case he needed it.

Hand in hand, Steve and Natasha waked out of medical and met everyone in the main room of the newly renovated base. Everyone cheered and applauded that their Captain was back.

"Welcome back, Cap," Coulson said shaking his hand.

"You too, Sir," Steve responded.

"Now that we are all back together. I have one announcement to make," Coulson said a few seconds later.

"What is it, Sir?" Clint asked. Coulson then turned to Natasha.

"Agent Romanoff, would you like to be my second-in-command?"

Natasha's jaw dropped. She had only been at SHIELD for 6 years now. Clint had higher seniority than her. He had been there for 15 years.

"Agent Coulson. I accept," Natasha finally responded as she fought back tears.

More cheers and applause were head from everyone at the base ad Coulson shook Natasha's hand and embraced her. He then looked her in the eyes and spoke.

"I'm glad Barton didn't kill you. You've been a great addition to SHIELD. He has definitely turned you around."

"Thank you sir, he has been a great partner to work alongside with. Steve has too," Natasha smiled.

Another applause was heard as Clint came up. Shook his partner's hand, and embraced her in a tight hug. Steve then did the same.

"Congratulations, Nat. I love you," he said as she left his arms.

"Thank you Steve. I love you too," she responded with a few tears. The two embraced again and he gave her a passionate kiss.

"I just have one last thing to say before we head out." He cleared his throat. "Ladies and gentlemen, meet Natasha Allianovna Romanoff, the new second-in-command of SHIELD!"

A big applause and cheer erupted from the small group. Natasha was smiling at Coulson handed her the key to Maria's office.

"When we get back to base, you can move in," Coulson said.

"Thank you, Sir. I am so honored."

"I'm happy to give it to you," he smiled and turned back to the team. "Now, let's pack up and go home. Wheels up in an hour." 


	13. Chapter 13

Once Natasha had finished packing, she went to find Leia, who was in her room organizing a few things.

"Leia, can we talk?" she asked.

"Yeah, what's up?" Leia asked.

"I just want to talk to someone who shares the same beliefs as me."

"Have a seat, Nat. I have something for you as well," Leia said smiling.

Natasha then took a seat on the bed as Leia go something from her desk. She then handed it to Natasha. Opening the box, she found a bible with a red leather cover.

"Leia, this is amazing," Natasha said lifting it out of the box.

"Open it. It's inscribed."

Natasha carefully opened the cover. Inside, Leia had neatly written:

_This Bible is given to Natasha Allianovna Romanoff_

_by Leia Amidala Organa-Solo_

_on the 22_ _nd_ _of February_

_in the year of 2015._

"Thank you so much, Leia. I love it," Natasha said as she closed the cover and put the book back the box.

"You're welcome. Now, what was it that you wanted to talk to me about?"

"Well, I just need some advice about how to share the gospel with the team. They still don't know yet", Natasha explained.

Leia thought for a few seconds before she spoke.

"Well, the first thing I would do is that I would pray. Ask God to give you the words to say to them. Second, I would probably start with the fact that while you were in the hospital, someone special came into your life," Leia explained.

"You make it sound so easy, and so did Anna."

"Nat, it is easy. If I can tell it to my husband and brother, then I know that you can tell it to the team."

"Thank you Leia," Natasha responded as a few tears fell down her cheeks. She then wiped them away with her sleeve.

 

"If you want to reference any verses from scripture, then you should reference John 3:16. It explains God's love for us very adequately," Leia said as she got out her phone. And showed Natasha the verse. Natasha quickly glanced at it before a tear fell from her eye.

"OK. I'll read the book on my way home. I was planning to read John anyway," Natasha said. "Any last advice?"

Leia thought a few moments and then spoke.

"Don't be discouraged if they reject you. It just means that they are rejecting God and are not ready to accept Him. Don't give up on them, instead pray that one day they will clearly see who He is."

"I pray every night that they will," Natasha responded.

"That's good. I do too. I pray that you faith will continue to grow each day," Leia said.

"Thank you, Leia. I really appreciate it."

"You're welcome. Can I pray for you now?" Leia asked.

"Sure."

Both girls held hands and closed their eyes.

"Dear God, we come to you now with hearts of thankfulness that Natasha is now second-in-command of SHIELD, but even more importantly, she is a new believer in You. I pray that she will serve SHIELD just as like her friend, Maria Hill, did. Continue to lift up the team as they still mourn over her loss. Wrap your arms around them and comfort them during this tough time. I also pray that Natasha's faith will continue to grow and that you will give her the right words to say for when she goes back to SHIELD and tells the team about who you are. I pray that the team will not reject you and that they will want to follow you like Natasha. Finally I ask that you will be with the team and the rest of us here on the base as we recover from our wounds. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen."

"Amen," Natasha responded with a few tears. "Thank you, Leia. I feel much better."

"Alright then, good luck. I'll be praying for you."

After embracing each other, Natasha picked up her new bible and went back to her room to make sure she had everything packed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leia's last piece of advice to Natasha (Don't be discouraged if they reject you...) was actually something that a friend of mine said to me when I was telling her about this story.


	14. Chapter 14

Eventually, it was time to say 'good-bye'. Hugs and handshakes were exchanged between the four people of the base, the now four members of SHIELD, and Anna. Even a few tears were shed.

A few minutes later, Coulson and his team boarded the train and return. Anna would stay at the base one more day before heading home herself.

The ride home was mostly quiet. Natasha had fallen asleep listening to her bible app. Noticing her asleep, Steve carefully removed the phone from her lap and turned it off. He didn't have time to completely view the screen, so he figured she was just listening to music. He then put his arm around her shoulder and listened to her slow breaths as she slept peacefully.

Across the aisle, Coulson and Clint sat together, discussing quietly about arrangements for Maria. Her body had been cremated back on Yavin 13 and her ashes were stored in a container that was packed securely in Coulson's suitcase. The plan was to have a small memorial service for he back at HQ. Maria always wanted to be buried on SHILED soil since it had been her second home.

An hour later, the four agents arrived back. Natasha was still asleep and again, Steve didn't want to wake her. So, like before, he lifted her up and carried her back to the base. Coulson and Clint followed with the bags.

Back in their room and with Clint pulling back the covers, Steve gently laid Natasha on the bed and carefully removed the earbuds from her ears. He then pulled the covers over her sleeping body.

As he sat on the bed for a few minutes, he heard Natasha's slow breathing, indicating she was sleeping. He then quietly peeked at her phone to see what she had been listening to. Turns out, it wasn't music, but a book. Not wanted to be too nosy, he just stared at the words in front of him from where he had stopped the audio. It read.

_"_ _For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,_

_That whoever believes in him shall not perish_

_But have eternal life (John 3:16 NIV Bible)."_

He then shut of the phone, set it gently on the nightstand, and left the room.

"I've seen those words somewhere," he said to himself quietly. He then went into the kitchen to grab a bite to eat and a water bottle.

As he sat at the table, the words on Natasha's phone came into his mind.

"Hmm, now where have I seen those words?" He said again. He would have searched it, but he left his phone in where Natasha was asleep and he didn't want to wake her.

As he finished off the last drink from his water bottle, he threw it out and left the room, still with the words on his mind.


	15. Chapter 15

Natasha woke up a little confused. The last thing she remembered was the voice of her bible app. Everything after that was a big blur. Looking around the room she noticed that her bag was on the floor, her shoes were taken off, and her phone was on the nightstand next to her. Sitting up in the bed, she grabbed her phone to see if it was still talking. It wasn't. It had been paused on John 3:16.

After setting her phone back on the nightstand, Natasha got out of bed, slipped her shoes on, and walked out of the room.

Things were fairly quiet as she walked through the main room. She was just about to go back in the room when she heard footsteps. She immediately clenched her fists and turned around, ready to throw a punch.

"Easy Nat," the voice said. She then put her hands down and looked into the eyes of the mystery voice.

"Sorry. Steve."

"It's Ok. I was just coming to get you anyway. We're having a small memorial for Maria out back."

"Oh, OK," Natasha responded. Hand in hand, they walked outside to the place where Maria was to be buried.

Clint tossed the last pile of dirt aside the small hole. Coulson then placed the container filled with Maria's ashes inside and Clint reburied it. Steve placed the marker by the pile and for about three minutes, the team was silent until Coulson spoke.

"Agent Hill was probably one of the best agents I ever worked alongside with. She definitely deserved the role she did, serving as second-in-command to Fury, and then to me." He then laid a red rose on the small pile of dirt in front of the marker.

Clint spoke next, saying that Maria was clever headed and an excellent markswoman. He the laid his rose. Steve was the third one to speak, saying how grateful he was to have her by his side while SHIELD was being taken down by HYDRA. He then laid his rose.

Natasha was the last person so speak. As tears streamed down her face, she began to speak.

"Maria was the best and only other female agent I had the privilege of working alongside with. She definitely fought her way through the ranks to become second-in-command. While I will miss the presence of another female agent, I am happy to take her place as second-in-command." She then laid her rose next to Steve's,

Upon standing up, she fell into Steve's arms, crying heavy tears. With his arm around her, he led her back inside to their room, sat down on the bed, and just held her.

Eventually, Coulson and Clint came inside and the four agents gathered in the kitchen for a silent dinner.


	16. Chapter 16

After  two days of planning and praying, which included Anna teaching her another method for sharing the gospel, Natasha was ready to share her story with the team. 

Before leaving her room, she said a quick prayer to God.

"Dear God, today is the day that I get to share the gospel with my fellow SHIELD agents. I'm very excited to finally do this, but I'm also very nervous. Please be with me and give me the right words to say. Also, help my team members to be open to your word and not reject who you are. I love you, LORD, and I'm ready to follow your command of making disciples. In Jesus' name. Amen."

With her bible and outline in hand, she proudly walked out of the room and headed to room 3, the same room where they had found out about the mission to Yavin 13.

* * *

Coulson, Clint, and Steve were waiting patiently for Natasha to arrive. All had received a text from her, telling them to meet in room 3 at 11:00 in the morning.

They had no idea what their new second-in-command was up to.

"Could it be a mission, Sir?" Clint asked.

"I have no idea, Barton, she didn't even tell me what was going on. All she told me was to make sure that this room was clear," Coulson responded.

"I saw an outline sticking out of a book on her nightstand, but I didn't read it," Steve added.

A few minutes later, Natasha walked into the room.

When she entered, all three agents stood up as a sign of respect.

"Have a seat guys, this isn't a formal meeting," she said smiling. The three agents then sat while she pulled out an outline and turned on the viewing screen.

"Guys, it's time you knew the reason why I have been acting different lately. Clint, Steve, this is the story that I was going to tell you."

She took a breath and said a quick prayer to God.

 _"Do not be afraid, my daughter. I will help you speak and teach you what to say."_ (Exodus 4:12 NIV)

Upon hearing the whisper, she smiled and began to speak.

"It all began as I was sitting in a hospital room sitting in a chair by Steve's bedside. Leia had come into the room to comfort me, but I wanted something else. I needed a fresh opinion. I had just lost my only other friend and only female agent that was here. Nothing against you, Clint," Natasha said smiling at Clint.

"It's alright, Nat," Clint said laughing.

"Anyway, Leia, called in one of her friends, Anna Flannigan. She then introduced me to someone who is now my best friend. His name is Jesus Christ.

Not a word was said when Natasha spoke the name. They were all eager to hear more.

"Anna taught me about who Jesus was. She also taught me that no matter what people have done in their lives, or in my case, no matter how much red I have in my ledger, He still loves each and every one of us. In fact, He loved us so much that his father, or God, sent him to die on a cross for our sins. Steve, when you woke up that day, this was the story that you asked me about."

Steve nodded as Natasha showed a verse on the viewing screen. She also held up her bible.

"This is God's word, the Bible. In it, he teaches us what to do and not to do to be more like him. This verse on the screen, here, is from the Book of Romans, chapter 3, verse 23. It says that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (NIV Bible). Every one of us makes mistakes, but God forgave us from them. Even the ones we make today."

Tears began to form in everyone's eyes. They all knew the pasts that they had endured.

"Romanoff, where are you going with this?" Coulson asked.

"Well, I am teaching you about a god. But he's not just any god, he is the ONE TRUE GOD!" Natasha responded.

"I knew there was only one God!" Steve exclaimed.

"Steve, you are absolutely right. There is only one God."

"So, is this guy still dead?" Clint asked.

"No, and that's the best part. On the third day, he rose again from the dead. He is alive, and now He sits at the right hand of God, the father," Natasha explained. Clint smiled at the news. "This guy is amazing," he thought to himself.

"So what does this have to do with you?" Coulson asked.

"Well, Anna taught me about having a relationship with Christ, and thanks to her, I now have that relationship. It's amazing. I can go to God and talk to him, just like he's my friend. I can ask Him anything I want," Natasha took a breath. "I am now asking you guys to have a relationship with Him and let him become your friend as well."

A small stir went around the room. So far, everything that Natasha had said about this man was absolutely amazing to all of them.

"What do we have to do?" Steve asked. Natasha then showed anther verse on the screen.

"According to Romans, chapter 10, verse 9, all you have to do is confess with your mouth that Jesus is LORD, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will then be saved (NIV Bible). It's that simple."

"That's amazing, Nat," Steve said. He then took a deep breath and spoke. "I want to have a relationship with Him."

"Me too," Clint said raising his hand.

"Same here," Coulson said as he put his hand up.

"Alright then, close your eyes and repeat after me."

As the team did this, Natasha looked down at her outline so that she could correctly say the prayer that Anna had texted to her.

"Dear God, please forgive me. I know I'm a sinner."

"I believe Jesus died and rose from the dead…"

"I believe Jesus died and rose from the dead…"

"so I could be forgiven of my sins…"

"so I could be forgiven of my sins…"

"and live forever in heaven."

"and live forever in heaven."

"Thank you for loving me…"

"Thank you for loving me…"

"and allowing me to have a personal relationship with you."

"and allowing me to have a personal relationship with you."

"In Jesus' name I pray, Amen."

"Amen," The agents responded as they opened their eyes.

"Congratulations to you all. You are now followers of Christ," Natasha said.

The three agents wiped smiled as they wiped a few tears from their eyes. Then they stood up, walked over to Natasha and all four joined in a big group hug.

"So, you were reading the Bible that day. Before you fell asleep?" Steve asked.

"Yes, and I was actually listening to the book of John. Steve, the verse that you saw, and yes, I know you looked at my phone, is one of the best verses to explain God's love for us." Natasha answered him.

"What is it?" Clint asked. Natasha directed their eyes to the screen one more time.

"It says, 'for God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (NIV Bible)." Natasha read off the screen.

"That is so beautiful, Nat. It does explain God's love," Clint said.

"Indeed it does," Natasha smiled.

"So, now what do we do?" Coulson asked.

"Well, the first thing that I did was that I began to read his word. Anna let me borrow her phone for that night and I started reading. The first story I read was how God created this earth and everything in it. Leia gave me this bible." She explained as she opened the book to where Leia's handwriting was.

"Can we get a copy on our phones?" Steve asked as he took out his phone. Coulson and Clint did the same thing.

"Yeah, and I can show you what to do," Natasha said. She then showed everyone how to find and download the app. She also helped them create their profiles, add a picture, and request and accept friends. She then directed them to the plans tab.

"Anna recommended a one-year bible plan. I didn't start it yet, but I'm willing to start with you guys so we can keep up."

"That's a good idea, Nat. We can then meet once a week to discuss what we've read," Clint said.

"Ok then, let's get on the plan today. We can then have our first meeting next week, right here in this room," Natasha said. She then showed them what plan to start. Coulson then spoke up.

"So, final question here. This god, he isn't Thor?"

"No, Sir, he is one true God. And I'm pretty sure he doesn't dress like either Thor or Loki," Natasha said smiling. Steve smiled at the last line as the memory came back into his mind when he said that to her on the quinjet. Coulson then left the room to answer his cell phone. Meanwhile. Steve followed him out as well. He was going to start reading right away. Meanwhile, Clint stayed behind and watched Natasha turn off the screen and organize her things.

"Nat, can I ask you something?" he said quietly.

"Sure, what's up?"

"I was wondering. Now that you have this relationship now. Is this the reason for why you haven't had n anxiety attack in the past few days?"

"It is. Every night, I pray that God will help me to be at ease and take away the thoughts of Russia. I can tell that it's working because I'm getting much better with sleeping time," she explained. Clint then embraced her in a tight hug.

"That's awesome, Nat. By the way, that was definitely a story worth waiting for. I am honored to now have that same relationship that you have. I am so glad that you found a new friend, especially if Steve and I can't always be there for you," Clint responded. He then left the room, allowing Natasha to have some quiet time to contact Leia.

She would then call Anna since she had a few questions for her.

 


	17. Chapter 17

Once the room was cleared, Natasha sat down in a chair, got out her phone, and sent Leia a text.

_"_ _Thanks for your prayers. Everyone has been saved!"_

Leia then responded a few minutes later.

_"_ _Congratulations, Natasha. Proud of all of you."_

After replying with a 'thank you' and smiley face, Natasha then called Anna.

"Hello?'

"Hey, Anna. It's Natasha. I have great news."

"What's that?" Anna asked.

"I taught the team about God. Now all of us are believers."

"Natasha, that's amazing! I've been praying for you and the team ever since you left the base."

"Thank you, Anna. Now, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure. Go for it."

"I was reading in the book of John the other day, and I read about how a man named, John the Baptist, had baptized Jesus in the river. What exactly is baptism?"

Anna thought for a few seconds and then answered back.

"Baptism is an outward expression of our faith in Christ. It shows other people that we follow him in all that we do. It is a picture of us before we were believers and then when we were saved. It is done through immersion, or going under the water. I've been baptized myself and it was an amazing experience. I remember going under the water and coming up. It felt like a giant weight had been taken off me," Anna explained.

"Wow. That sounds amazing."

"It was definitely a great experience for me. And now that I think about it, there's a three-part membership class coming up at my church. You have to take that in order to be baptized. The following week after the class is an outdoor baptism. I'm actually singing with the worship team that weekend too. If you're ready, I can sign you up."

"Please do. I'm ready to make to take the next step. I'll then talk the team and see if they are ready too," Natasha responded.

"Alright then, I'll wait to hear from you before I email my pastor."

"OK. Thanks again for everything. You have been a great help," Natasha said.

"You are very welcome. By the way, if you don't mind, I remember the night that I arrived, you were having an anxiety attack and that you reached your breaking point. Was it because of Russia?"

Natasha nearly dropped her phone on the table. Her body even began to shake.

"Nat, are you there?" Anna asked.

"I'm sorry, Anna. It's still too hard for me to talk about it,"

"It's Ok. It was my fault for bringing it up anyway. Remember, I'm here to listen whenever you want to talk," Anna said soothingly. Natasha's body then stopped shaking.

"Thank you, Anna. I'll tell you eventually."

"Have you talked to God about it? You know He'll always listen."

"I have. Ever since you introduced me to Him, I pray every night that he will calm my nerves and allow me to sleep. I haven't had an attack since," Natasha explained.

"That's good. I am so proud of you and the team."

"Thank Anna. By the way, when do you need to know about the baptism service and the class?"

"By the time the class starts, which is next Sunday. You have a week yet."

"OK, I'll talk to the team at our meeting next week."

"Alright. Have a good rest of your day." Anna then hung up.

Natasha then sat in the room in silence as she began to read the reading for day one of the plan.


	18. Chapter 18

(One Month Later)

Natasha, Steve, Clint, and Coulson stood at the front of the auditorium next to the baptism tank at Avalon Christian Church. They all had gone through the membership class, written and shared their testimonies, and were introduced on stage that morning and the evening before. Now they were ready to take the next step. Anna had also come in from the green room to join the group. She would have to go back right away once it was finished so that she could be on stage for the 10:30 service.

There were a few other people that were being baptized as well. One by one, they shared a piece from their testimony and then the pastor, Pastor Matthew Evans, baptized them in the tank of water.

"Our final four people this morning are from an organization known as SHIELD. They are also new believers. Let's welcome them as they come up here."

The crowd applauded as four agents made their way to front. Clint was to go first, then Coulson, and then Steve.

Finally it was Natasha's turn. With tears in her eyes, she spoke into the microphone.

"I met the LORD in a hospital room while I was waiting for my husband, Steve, to wake up after being shot twice in the stomach earlier that day. My fellow, and only other female agent, had been killed in the line of action. As I sat there in my wheelchair, since I had suffered two broken ribs, I realized I needed something else. What I wanted was a fresh opinion. Besides my husband being shot, I was also dealing with some trauma after being held captive in Russia a few months before." She took a breath as the thoughts started to come back into her head .

Steve came up and put a hand on her shoulder to comfort her. Feeling the hand, she began to speak again. "My friend, Leia, then called in one of her friends. Her name was Anna Flannigan. With her help, I gave my life to the LORD, and now today, I stand here to become baptized as a new Christian. I am ready to make that profession of faith," she then handed the paper to Steve and stepped into the tank.

"Natasha do you love Jesus?"

"Yes."

"And do commit yourself to follow him in all of who you are?"

"I do."

"Alright then, hold your nose," Natasha held her nose as Pastor Matthew Evans tilted her back into the water.

"Natasha Alianovna Romanoff, I baptize you in the name of the Father, and of the Son Jesus Christ, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen," he said as he brought her back up.

The audience applauded as she gave the pastor a hug and stepped out of the pool, Anna handed Natasha her towel and embraced her. The two girls then went inside the church so Natasha could change. Coulson and the team followed.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No copyright infringement intended on any of the song lyrics used in this chapter

Natasha walked into the auditorium and stood by Leia and Anna's family as the worship team sang the song "Our God" (Chris Tomlin). Anna was on stage with her hand raised. She was also the only singer, as well as the only girl on stage.

With her hand raised, Natasha looked at the screen and sang out the words.

_Our God is greater_

_Our God is stronger_

_God you are higher than any other_

_Our God is healer_

_Awesome and power_

_Our God_

_Our God._

Once the song ended, Pastor Evans introduced all the new members of the church who had recently completed the three-part class. He also mentioned the names of those who were baptized before the service. Natasha smiled as Pastor Evans read her name and mentioned that she was baptized.

After saying a prayer for the new members Natasha and the rest of the group went back to their seats. Pastor Evans then announced that it was time for the offering.

During the offering the team sang the most beautiful song that Natasha had ever head. The title of it was "Crown Him (Majesty)" (Chris Tomlin featuring Kari Jobe).

"Will you stand and sing with us?" The leader asked.

Natasha stood up and sang out along with Anna and everyone else.

_Majesty_

_Lord of all_

_Let every throne_

_before Him fall_

_The King of kings_

_Oh come adore_

_Our God who reigns_

_Forevermore_

_Praise God who reigns_

_Forevermore_

_You're the God who reigns_

_Forevermore!_

The message was exactly what Natasha and the team needed to hear. It was about the importance of Jesus's death on the cross and the accomplishments that came with it. Tears were forming in Natasha's eyes as Pastor Evans finished up.

The final song was yet another beautiful piece called "Jesus Paid It All" (Kristian Stanfill). Anna even had a solo. Natasha smiled and tried her best to fight back tears as she listened to Anna's beautiful voice. Next to her, Steve, Clint, and Coulson were listening closely and quietly singing, taking everything in around them.

With her hand raised high in air and tears now flooding her eyes and falling down her face, Natasha proudly sang the final bridge.

_Oh praise the One_

_who paid my debt_

_And raise this life_

_up from the dead._

_Oh praise the One_

_who paid me debt_

_And raised this life_

_up from the dead._

After singing the phrase a few more times, the band quieted down and sang the chorus one last time..

_Jesus paid it all_

_All to Him I owe_

_Sin had left a_

_crimson stain_

_He washed it_

_white as snow._

_Sin had left a_

_crimson stain_

_He washed it_

_white as snow._

Pastor Evans came up on stage, gave the blessing, and dismissed the congregation. Natasha then went up to him and asked he wouldn't mind taking a big group picture in front of the stage. He agreed and everyone arranged themselves next to him. Anna then took the picture using her phone. She would make sure that everyone got a copy as soon as she could.


	20. Chapter 20

After church, Anna treated everyone to lunch with her and her family. Leia and her family had to get back to Alderaan right away to get ready for an upcoming mission.

As they were leaving the restaurant, Coulson made an announcement.

"Miss Flannigan, would you like to join us? Be an Agent of SHIELD?"

Anna was shocked.

"Sir, I'm honored to accept the position, but I thought you already had a second-in-command."

"I do, but that's not why I'm recruiting you. I want not only another female agent at SHIELD, I want you to be our spiritual leader. I want you to help us grow in our faith. I think you're the best qualified to do it," Coulson explained.

Anna then though for a few minutes and then spoke.

"Agent Coulson. I accept." The team then applauded as Coulson shook her hand.

"Agent Flannigan. Welcome to SHIELD."

* * *

(2 weeks later)

Coulson assigned Natasha to be Anna's SO, but everyone helped train the new agent in the areas of speed, strength, stability (staying balanced), and land and aquatic combat.

Since Natasha was no longer able to fight with two guns, she decided to pass the skill onto Anna, who was a natural at it, like she had done it before. She hit every target that was placed in front of her.

"You're just like me when I used to do it," Natasha said.

"Hmm, maybe that's because I've seen you do it so many times.' Anna responded smiling as Steve and Clint came into the room.

"How did you learn to run and shoot a gun as fast as you did? I think you were even faster than Natasha when she was able to do it." Steve asked. Natasha gave him the look.

"I used to be a Jedi Knight and I had to learn how to do this, except the guns were a little different than these ones," Anna explained.

"Nice!" Clint said.

Every day, everyone met in Room 3 where Anna would teach them more about who God was. They also discussed the assigned reading for the day that they were on in the one-year reading plan that was on the Bible app. At the end of each session, they would close in prayer. They would then eat dinner and then head off to bed.

Now that Natasha and Steve were married and Anna had now made SHIELD her second home, Anna was given Natasha's room to be her own. She would occasionally go back home to her hometown for family and special church events.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read this story, I know it was long. Anyway, I want to leave you with a few final thoughts. 
> 
> First, if you haven't figured it out by now, the special guest that was mentioned in the description was actually me. However to keep myself anonymous, I renamed myself Anna Flannigan. Pretty clever, right? 
> 
> Second, as you read in the story, Natasha is the one person that made the decision to have a relationship with the LORD. She then shared the gospel with the rest of the team and they were saved as well. As mentioned, Anna (I) had shared the gospel with Leia. Then, after being contacted by Leia, Anna (I) shared it with Natasha. Now I want to share it with you. If you were moved by Anna's (my) or Natasha's presentation to accept Jesus into your heard and have a relationship with Him, please feel free to message me or leave me a review on the chapter that moved you the most. As I was writing this story in one of my old composition notebooks, I prayed every night that this story would be used as a witnessing tool to share God's word. Anyway, my God is an amazing person. I believe in my heart that He called me to write and share this amazing story with you.
> 
> Part 7, "S.A.F.E. " is already posted. All I will say is that it is an emotional story for one of our characters. 
> 
> Follow me on Twitter (@AdorationAmy) and check me out on [tumblr](http://adorationamy.tumblr.com) to ask questions and see what I am up to.


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